《艺术人生》——（自序与道白）张涛 著
Artistic Life - (Preface and Confession)
不惑之年，脾气和性格并未使我意识到生命的短暂与无常，很久以来，我还是兀自得意于“愤青”这个洋溢着生命活力的称谓，富有生命的激情，活的慷慨激昂！
At the age of 40s, temperament and character never made me aware of the shortness and impermanence of life. Instead, I've long been reveled in "young cynic", a vigorous appellation, living heatedly with full of passion.
忽一日，得知一位同学老大姐，查出了癌症晚期，最初的反应是非常惊愕，总感到死亡还很陌生、很遥远，与己无关。后来与这位老大姐之间短信互动，渐渐地，她让我感到了心情复杂和沉重：其文字间的语气、语调、对人世间的感慨和对生活的眷恋，都让我倍受刺激。为了调节她的心境，我劝道：我们都是艺术家，我们看待、理解生活的方式就是绘画，它会调节心情，安抚灵魂的，拿起画笔吧，将您对生命的理解与感慨表现出来吧。
One day, all of a sudden, a schoolmate and sister was diagnosed with advanced cancer. First off, I was stunned, since the death concept is always strange, far away and none of my business. Afterwards, during the SMS interaction with her, my mind was weighted down: the mood, the tone, the sigh with emotions to the world and the love for life expressed in her words made me suffer stimulation. To adjust her state of mind, I tried to persuade: we are both artists. The way we regard and understand life is the painting, which can adjust our moods and pacify our souls. Just pick up your brush and express your understanding and inspiration of life.
半年之后，老大姐用充满了欣慰和喜悦的语气告诉我：病痛的折磨都在绘画的过程中逐渐消失，进入了创作状态后，一切都忘记了，告别了紧张、奔波、疲于挣扎的世界，回到了自己久违的精神领域，感到了平静和幸福……。
Half a year later, she told me in a tone with relief and joy: the torture from the illness gradually disappeared during the process of painting as she will forget everything when entering into the creation state, departing the world of intensity, rush and struggling, coming back to her long-lost realm of spirit and feeling peaceful and happy...
再以后，大姐的女儿发来短信：妈妈刚刚去世，她很勇敢，走的很平静……。鼻子一酸，我的眼睛立刻模糊了。
Then, there was a text message from her daughter: Mon has just passed away, bravely and peacefully... A lump came into my throat with tears blurred my eyes at once.
后来悼念老大姐，拜读了她最后的遗作，其生命最后的情感发挥的淋漓尽致：巍峨苍茫的远山下一片祥和、宁静；刚直挺拔的青松历经风雨、孤傲凌立；枯黄而又富于希望的色彩正祈冀美好的生活，几间前后交错的山间民居喻示着心中的世外桃源……。在气氛凝重的空间里，内心的悲痛和感慨夹杂着无法控制的心颤，强烈的感受到这幅作品对我有着一种静默的冲击，也不知道是在怎样的空间里，相互交流细细叙述着……。模糊的视线里，老大姐微笑着，渐渐地淡化、走向了远方。
Later, I've read her final work for mourning as her emotions during her last hours burst out incisively: there's a kind of peace and hush under the towering and vast mountain; upright pines stand aloof and proudly through winds and rains; the color, withered and yellow but full of hope, is the expectation for a wonderful life. Some folk houses located front and back among the mountain indicate the land of idyllic beauty in her minds... In such a dignified space, with the inner feeling of sorrow and sigh as well as uncontrollable heart flutter, I can feel a kind of silent impact from the work in an inexpressible space under interaction and narration... In a obscure sight, the sister smiles, fading out gradually to the distant place.
什么是生命？什么又是艺术？
What is life? What is art?
“离离原上草，一岁一枯荣”……
"Boundless grasses over the plain, Come and go with every season"...
记得学画初期，在启蒙先生的教育下，练书法、习篆刻、临画谱，遵师道、依古训，“清心地以消俗虑，善读书以明理境，却早誉以及远道，亲风雅以正体裁”。习宋人画风、研历代名画，绘画追求笔墨苍劲、风格老辣，一幅少年老成的样子！总听说：运墨可分五彩、五色扰心乱目。青春时期的我，努力地控制着内心的躁动和激情，一切模仿着前辈们的作品，对画面和表现技巧不断地临摹，反复锤炼，重复着，日复一日一遍又一遍的重复着……。
Recalling the initial stage of learning painting, I practiced calligraphy and seal cutting, and copied the paintings, following the teacher's principles of "clearing away the heart-fire to wash the vulgar ponders, reading to know black from white, refusing the honor to go further and being graceful for a perfect posture" and the old maxims under the education of my first teacher. I've learned the painting style of Song Dynasty, researched and experienced famous paintings through the ages, pursuing painting in bold and vigorous strokes and astute style, young and experienced! It is always heard that: the use of ink can be divided into five levels, but multiple colors will cause the disorder. During my adolescence, I tried to control the inner agitation and passion, continuously imitating the works by the predecessors from the perspectives of painting presentation and techniques of expression day by day, time after time...
偶一日，我问道，古人追求的内敛、含蓄、中庸的水墨文人画，为什么只有墨色黑白？色彩呢？为什么不能用鲜艳的色彩去自由而随性的表现五彩的世界呢？为什么不能用激情和热血去表现生活呢？众人愕然：你！你年少无知、轻狂肤浅、不学无术、狗屁不通！没有文化不知道害怕！……吓的我立刻闭嘴，将这疑惑咽了回去，夹起尾巴，老老实实，默默浸淫在了传统笔墨的黑白世界里。
Someday, I questioned, "for the ancients chasing after the restraining, reserved and moderate ink paintings, why is there only with black and white? Where are the colors? Why can't we show the world freely with bright colors? Why can't we show our lives with passion and righteous ardor?" Everyone was stunned. "Punk! You are young and know nothing, extremely frivolous, and have never learning nor skills with nonsense! You are uneducated and without fear!" I was frightened to shut up with such doubt, engaged in the black and white world of traditional ink without proposing any challenges.
鼓楼向南，穿过烟袋杆斜街，过了银锭桥，绕着后海南岸就到了恭王府——二十年前，这正是中国艺术研究院的所在地。记忆中，求学生涯的天空，始终是灰蒙蒙的。印象中一些镜头永远挥之不去：阴冷的冬日，不见一丝的阳光，阴霾的天空中时常会“呜呜”的飞过一阵鸽哨，我将头埋在衣领内，踏着枯黄的落叶和残雪，独自一人一直走在那很深的胡同里；有时会跨个双肩背包，登个半旧的自行车，窜在深巷中漫无目标地游荡；也常常会驻足仰天，张望一会儿被风旋卷起、又渐渐飘向远方天空中的塑料袋；身外的清冷，腹中的饥饿，内心的孤独和无助感，常常搅在一起，总是感觉日子非常非常的漫长；在食不果腹中，偶然会有一两个同学画友相互鼓励安慰，唯一的欣慰就是学业上一点点的进步。总之，青年后生，稚气未脱，北上求学，坚持着这种苦中有乐、乐在苦中的幸福生活，一方面追寻着心中的艺术和人生的疑问，一方面时刻在想：孤独奋斗就有前方，有前方就有希望。
Go southward of the drum-tower, through the Skewed Tobacco Pouch Street, pass the Silver Ingot Bridge and bypass the south bank of Houhai to Prince Gong Mansion-where Chinese National Academy of Arts was located at twenty years ago. In my memories, the sky of my campus life was always dusky. Some scenes under my impression will never be taken away: During gloomy and cold winter days without any sunshine, there were often cooing of the pigeon whistling over the lowery sky, while I covered my head inside the collar, walking along the deep alley accompanied with withered and yellow leaves and snow residual. Sometimes I put on a backpack and rode a used bicycle, wandering aimlessly in deep alleys. For other times, I would stop and look up at the sky, watching the plastic bags being picked up by the wind and drifting far away gradually to the distant sky; lonely without the warmth from friends or family and an empty and cold stomach without warm food, always mixed with inner loneliness and helplessness, which for me, was a very long day; Without sufficient food, I was occasionally encouraged and comforted by several confidants, and the only delight may be the academic progress. Anyway, as a young man, still possessing the innocence of childhood, I attended school northward and insisted on a happy life of seeking joy amidst sorrow, seeking for the art and life in my mind on one hand while on the other hand thinking all the time that: There will always be the place ahead with hope for strugglers in loneliness.
然而，由绘画兼顾美术学理论的学习和研究，远没有想象的简单。思维方式的转变，观念的更新是非常痛苦的。大量的功课需要恶补，大量的书需要反复研读。大学期间没有搭建好知识框架，现在才深刻体会到自己的苍白和无知，以至于时常怀疑自己是否还具备有学习的能力了？无边的学海、无际的天问真是令我望而却步，求学、问学、学问的过程简直就是对精神和意志的煎熬，简单的世界变得太复杂了，要想做个艺术上的明白人可是真的不容易！
However, the learning and research on both painting and theories of fine arts may not be as easy as you think. The transformation of the way of thinking and the renewal of ideas are extremely painful. Therefore, I have to repeatedly read and study numerous corresponding books for making up the shortage and loss. Failing to build the knowledge frame during college time, I have deeply realized my pale and ignorance to the extent of doubting my learning capacity. Boundless knowledge has discouraged me in the process of attending school, and seeking, questioning and learning is really a torment of spirit and will to me. It is so hard to be a sensible person of art as the simple world has become more and more complicated!
偶然翻出早年我在中国美术馆画展的宣传册，求学时的一个年轻的形象映到眼前：稚气未消、清瘦文雅、忧伤感怀却双目炯炯。我疑惑地凝视着照片，恍若隔世：这是我吗？我有过如此年轻吗？我现在怎么了？艺术还是我的专业么？
By accident, I've found out a brochure of my art exhibition in National Art Museum of China with a young image during school time: childish, thin, elegant and sentimental but with bright eyes. I gazed at the photo wonderingly as if a lifetime has passed: Is this me? Have I ever been so young? What happens to me now? Is art still my specialty?
残雪冬末，丁酉再降，恩师冯其庸先生驾鹤西去。连日里，每每想念先生，就不免想到他老人家多年来的谆谆教诲如历历在目，感到先生严谨治学、淡泊名利、勤奋一生的执著，实如一面光亮的明镜正在镜照我、呼唤我——学生愚钝啊，艺无精进，浮沉营生，真是有愧于恩师对我的期望。
In Ding You year, the end of winter with snow remaining, Feng Qiyong, my respected teacher, passed away. Day after day, every time I missed him, I will unavoidably think about his inculcation, still vivid in my mind, just like his insistence under rigorous scholarship, indifference to wealth and fame and diligence for his whole life, which is a bright mirror reflecting and calling me-I'm so stupid, without any enhancement but trapped in the trifles, feeling guilty to his expectation.
长夜焦虑、辗转反侧，身上劳损的肌肉隐痛，不绝如缕，也仿佛在提醒着我什么。过去总以为，生命很漫长，时间多的是，但随着年龄的增长令我日益感到肌体开始僵硬，身体逐渐下沉，原来灵敏的触觉、清晰的记忆和柔韧的躯体，开始变得迟钝、模糊、僵硬，渐渐散发出一些“朽气”，一如盛世下庸享俗乐的靡风和雾霾，让许多本然有意义的精神轮廓，变得模糊、萎靡乃至遮蔽。也许同别人一样，对于不觉“人生的路越走越窄”的“人到中年”的我来说，难免会问：人生就该如此吗？这是人生么？人生的意义到底是什么？我虽然不能断定自己是否过早步入了一种男性“更年期”，但“过的毫无意义！”这句常常脱口而出的话，却是我对自己生活无奈的愤慨和抗拒：我与俗为伍、周旋社会、夹缝谋生，在茫然、无序、焦躁、苦苦挣扎的同时，又魂牵梦绕、鬼使神差般地不断躲进书房画斋，寻求寄托，安抚心神。不觉日复日、年复年,前后纠结十余年，在纠结中不觉也有了一点自己的人生哲学。我觉得，现实以对精神的否定来肯定对精神贵族的普世需要与可能。无论你是谁，又如何营生，在道德败坏、物欲横流的历史图景中，抗拒心灵异化，就是抗拒衰老，就是伟大的艺术本性和精神；这种精神不仅不是什么职业的专属，反而是所有曾“恰同学少年、挥斥方遒”真性的留驻。换言之，一切有理想、有底线的正常人，都有这种超越年龄、超越职业、超越死亡的艺术担当。生命如白驹过隙，时不我待，面对雾霾挟裹与庸常蚕食，为人须自强，君子当抗争！一切只有真诚、必须真诚。真诚寄托艺术就是生命真诚的寄托，真诚探寻生命就是艺术真诚的探寻——这是抗拒沉沦、苟且、麻木的自我救赎。我常想，在对抗生命堕落、腐朽的同时，是否可以打破一切传统禁忌与思想专制，创造并体验新的人天境界和欢乐颂歌呢？
With anxiety at nights and tossing about in bed, dull pain of the strained muscles was very precarious, which seemed like a remind to me. In the past, I thought about life as endless with full of time. Yet as I grow older, I feel my body stiff and progressively sinking while sensitive tactile, fresh memory and soft body becoming blunt, vague and stiff, which reeks a smell of "rot", as if the vulgar extravagance and haze in the flourishing age while obscuring, enervating and obstructing the spirit shapes, meaningful in the origin. Same to others, when reaching middle age without feeling about "the life path getting narrower", I shall inevitably ask as follows: Is that the way life should be? Is this life? What 's the meaning of life? Although I cannot figure out whether I've entered into a male "climacteric", it is so "meaningless!" The word I've often said out is in fact an indignation and resistance to my life: being associated with vulgarity, dealing with things in the society and living in the crack, I turn back to the paintings, seeking for attachments and comforting my mind in a reverie and a curious coincidence at the time of struggling with absence, disorder and anxiety. Day after day and year after year, I've got a bit of philosophy of life with entanglement for decades of years. I reckon that the reality affirms the universal requirements and potentialities for intellectual aristocrat by negating the spirit. Whoever you are and however you earn a living are nonsense. To refuse the differentiation of our hearts in an immoral and materialistic history prospect is to refuse aging, as well as appreciating the great nature and spirit of art. Such spirit is a remained true nature of those who had "a dream of youth, filled with student enthusiasm" instead of professional exclusive. In other words, all the normal with lofty ideas and moral integrity shall undertake such art responsibilities beyond the age, the occupation and the death. Time passes quickly like a white pony's shadow across a crevice and waits for no one. Facing the haze and the commonplace, gentlemen shall make self-improvements and struggle! All are about sincerity, and sincerity is the only way. Art bearing sincerity is the true expectation of life, the life exploration with sincerity is the exploration with true art, namely, this is a self-atonement, resisting sinking, drifting along and numb. I used to think whether we can break all the traditional taboos and the mind dictation to create and experience the new human-nature realm and the joyous odes while against the corruption and degeneration of life?
一切用艺术来说话吧！
Let's speak all with art!
在这个是非混淆、少有良知的雾霾时代，缺的似乎恰恰不是“艺术”，以至“重要的不是艺术”。没有价值而动辄千万上亿的，那是炒作！在特定语境中，再昂贵的艺术品，也远远没有帮建一所希望小学、帮扶一些大学贫困生来的实实在在、更有价值！“形式上的艺术”也许很高明,但其现实的力量却孱弱，它不能改变人类历史进程，也难以在人类文明史中起到决定性的作用。无论作为“成教化、助人伦”的“边鼓”，还是作为“存在的目的”，都不是艺术的某种特定形式所能担待的。应该说，在中国现实意义上，艺术的伟大是“艺术精神”的伟大，而与“艺术”的作态无关。个性、自由与创造性批判的艺术精神的缺席，导致其社会价值的缺位和现代黎明的迟滞。我想，真正的艺术价值，一定是这种超越性的艺术精神的体现。
In such haze age, confusing right and wrong with rare conscience, we are not only lack of "art", and even "what important is not art". It is speculation for such valueless works frequently agitated as hundreds millions! In specific contexts, the value of the most expensive works of art will be no more than constructing a Hope Primary School or poor college students! "Formal art" may be brilliant but its real power is frail, neither changing the course of human history nor tipping the balance in history of human civilization. No matter as the "side drum" of "accomplishing indoctrination and human relations" or as the "purpose of existence", they cannot be afforded by some certain forms of art. It should be mentioned that from the perspective of Chinese practical significance, the greatness of art is the greatness of "art spirit", rather than the poses of "art". The absence of personality, liberty and art spirit of creative criticism has led to the omission of its social value and delaying of a modern dawn. I guess that the real art value must be the incarnation of such art spirit with transcendence.
在一个充斥着急功近利、沽名钓誉的伪艺术的时代，体制外的许多画家，都在为生物性欲望包装自己；而体制内受民供养的既得利益者，更是自封实力派大师、学术带头人等等。一些人虽口口声声自己的画作功力深厚、充满情感，是难得的艺术珍品，其实则大多不过是时利的奴隶和食利的蛆虫。
In a fake-art age of seeking quickens success and fishing for fame and credit, numerous painters outside the system are wrapping themselves for biological desires; Moreover, the painters with vested interest in the system, fed by the masses, have also proclaimed themselves as great masters and academic leaders. Those who keep on claiming their strong ability and deep emotions in their paintings which are so-called rare art treasures are actually slaves of benefits and selfish maggots.
仅就艺术的形态学而言，它也是人的表现，是人的全部教养及其各种社会关系在其总和性上的精神产物。它不仅强调技巧，更强调是否获具意义、变成意义、从而成为艺术精神内容本身的那种技巧。于我而言，我所热爱的传统文人画，也要接受这个法则的检视和审判，哪怕它在构图落幅上，在形势确定上、在色彩运用上、在笔墨表达上、在整体画面的气韵是否生动上、以至在创作风格如何确立上等等，有着这样那样非常专业、令人陶醉的玄妙魅力。当然，没有几十年的修为和历练，真的难以驾驭。然而，具有现实意义和时代精神的创造，却终究不是“喜写兰花、怒写竹”这么简单的事情。因为，无论在其上下和内外，始终还有一个精神的慧眼、一只价值判断的无形之手在发挥作用，从而使得作品绝非限于意形兼备，甚至可以“得意”而忘形。在此意义上，语言、形式、技法等工具，借景写情、托物言志等手段，实在就是思想、心智的本身，是不死的艺术精神的不断创造物，而不是生命的镣铐和枷锁。
In terms of art morphology, it is the representation of human and the spirit outcome from the total upbringing and various social relationships on basis of its aggregation. In addition to the technique, the skill becoming the art spirit itself by receiving and turning into the meaning have been emphasized. As for me, ancient Chinese literati paintings, ones of my favorites, shall accept the viewing and trail of such rule, even if they are intoxicatingly charming with high profession in composition, in determining of the situation, in the use of colors, in the expression of the use of brushes, in the vivid artistic conception of the whole picture and in the establishment of painting style. Beyond doubt, it is hard to control without cultivation and experience for decades. However, the creations with practical significance and spirit of the time are not so simple as "painting an orchid with pleasure while painting a bamboo with anger". Because there are spirit eyes and an intangible hand of value judgment playing a role whether up and down or inside and outside in order to release the works from limitations of consideration to the meaning and the shape, even expressing the meaning beyond the shape. In such meaning, tools including languages, forms and techniques as well as approaches such as expressing emotions through describing the scenery and holding things to speech will are the minds and thought as well as constant creatures under the immortal art spirit rather than the shackles and chains of life.
艺术是独特个性的自主创造。可是，中国传统文人画之笔墨是非常严谨的、高度程式化的，一些稍稍自我意念的表现，都会脱离传统范畴的清规戒律。对文人画而言，传统形式的束缚，令功利化、碎片化的现代生活和个体，对人生的认知、感受和理解已经很难融入其中，哪里还能够谈得上对时代精神的整体感知和独立意志的表达？语式僵硬、题材陈旧、手法单一，如果再学识浅薄、眼界狭隘、意识僵化，靠拾古人之牙慧何来自主意志和真情实感？这显然违背了艺术的本质！
Art is the self creation of uniqueness. In spite of that, the ink of ancient Chinese literati paintings is precise and highly stylized as even a bit of self-expression may break the forbidden ground of tradition. To the literati paintings, restrictions from traditional forms, combined with the modern life and individuals featured with utilitarianism and fragmentation, make it difficult for perception, feeling and understanding to well integrate with life. So, in what ways, how can we talk about the overall perception to the spirit of the time and the expression of the independent will? Considering stiff mode, obsolete themes, monotonous skills, with the addition of little learning, a narrow world and rigid consciousness, how shall we build independent will and real feelings by following suit of the ancients? This obviously kills the faith of art!
我知道，传统笔墨的反复锤炼是认识和掌握传统绘画的必要手段，笔墨语言的本身也可以达到精彩绝妙境界。但是，没有任何数据可以证明，在掌握传统绘画与继承伟大传统之间存在着一种必然关系。“传统”也有“道器”之别。形而上之为道，形而下之为器。我不知道在多族一体、吸纳包容、涵化发展的中华文化精神中，我们在继承发扬上究竟是重“道”还是重“器”。但千年传承、万世一系，身边我所看到的却多是教条、僵硬、汉儒化、（汉文化与儒道化）程式化的东西。许多非常精彩的笔墨，由于缺乏“吸纳包容、涵化发展”伟大的超越精神引导，最终也不过落得一介“传移模写”罢了，从形式到内容无不给人以嚼蜡感。不妨这样说，在艺术创作的思想感情上，如果情感追随笔墨程式，思想委顿于惯性思维，那么，这样的作品岂不是灵魂的欺骗吗？
I know that the repeated temper of traditional ink is a necessary skill to recognize and master traditional paintings while the ink language itself may reach a splendid and wonderful realm. Nevertheless, no data can prove an inevitable connection between mastering traditional paintings and inheriting the great traditions. For "tradition", it can also be divided into "skill" or "tool" Metaphysics can be referred as skill, while physics can only be referred to as "tool". I'm not sure whether we shall pay attention to "skill" or "tool" in nt in inheriting and carrying forward Chinese cultural spirit of multiple nations, absorption and tolerance and acculturation development. Whereas, after thousands of years of inheritance, there are only more stylized, stereotyped doctrine, and Han Confucianism (the Han culture, the Confucianism and Taoism culture) left. Many ink paintings, in the absence of the guidance of the great transcendent spirit, "absorption and tolerance and acculturation development", were finally "replication by transferring" with insipid feelings from the form to the content. In other words, as to the thoughts and feelings of art creation, if the emotions only follow the ink style while the ideology gets used to conventional thinking, the work is just like the deception of soul.
艺术讲究的就是艺术家全面的文化修养和人生的超越性修为。
The art is significantly related to the cultural accomplishment in full dimensions and the cultivation of transcendence in life.
多年以来，总感觉中国传统绘画就是一种毫无血性的艺术，在家国伦理思想的作用下，中国文化传统有一种向内、安内的力量，在保全身家、一己安逸的人生哲学中，精神自由和自主意志的表达非常微弱。文人画所呈现的画面是总是隐晦含蓄的、绕着弯的。其躲避现实的胆小软弱、阴柔纤巧、无奈隐忍，而追求画面上的苍润老辣、阳刚大气、厚重豪放，这本身就是一个十足的矛盾体。由于世界观和历史感不同，有人认为中国人文传统是一种博大精深的“含蓄美”，也有人则更多看到的是历史和人生的“沉重与无奈”。也许，当世界早已步入“现代史”阶段，将“含蓄美”放置四海、一统天下，就不免获得“抱残守缺”、“思想贫困”的新定义。甚至可以说，这种鸵鸟式与犬儒化的生态，未免不是躲避现实、冷漠自私的精神写照，与古往今来我们历史上诸多仁人志士“留取丹心照汗青”的伟大精神传统又有哪点相似？而即便在“天人合一”这一“共识重叠”或“叠合认同”上，也因意维的错置有着很不相同、甚至完全相反的来路。如时下各种所谓的“去欲养德、抒己野逸”的“修心养性”，如果不是表面理由高调而实则明哲保身，就多是一种人性的蒙昧和压抑。环顾“神州”，可以说，甚至连朱耷的隐喻、徐渭的迷狂之类的人的正常反应也丧失殆尽，可谓已经是到了文化变态，精神退化，知行悖背和人格分裂的“失神”绝地。
For years, I've considered Chinese traditional paintings as an art without characters. While under the effect of family-country ethics, Chinese cultural tradition is featured with an inward power of pacifying the interior, while the freedom of spirit and independent will have been weakly expressed in the philosophy of preserving the wealth and self-ease. The pictures presented by literati paintings are obscure and implicit. There are the timidness, softness, gentleness and delicateness, helplessness and forbearance embodied by it to avoid reality and the oldness, magnificence and profoundness pursued in picture, which is the contradiction itself. Due to different world views and historical sense, someone holds that the humanistic tradition of China is a profound "beauty of implicitness", but some people see more the "heaviness and helplessness" of history and life. Since the world has stepped to the phase of "modern history", when the "beauty of implicitness" concept is used for the whole world, it may gain the new definition of "conservative" and "poor thought". It can even be said that such ostrich-style and cynic-style attitude may be the spiritual reflection of avoiding reality, being indifferent and selfless. Are there any similarities with the great spiritual tradition of people with lofty ideals that "my loyalty may leave a page in the annals" in our history from the ancient times to the present? And there are the significant different and even opposite roads out of displacement of will and thinking even in terms of the "consensus overlap" or "overlap recognition" concerning "man is an integral part of the nature". And for the so-called "cultivation of one's original nature" by "getting rid of the desire and cultivates moral and expressing the viewpoints", if it is not the superficially high-key, it is actually to be worldly wise and make oneself safe, which is the vagueness and constraint of humanity. Looking around the whole China, it can be said that even the normal reactions of the metaphor of Zhu Da and Xu Wei have been lost. It can be said to enter the stage of cultural abnormality, spiritual degeneration, knowing and doing difference and personality split.
艺术是个人的精神主义和象征。缺少情感乃至激情的穿透力，就会成为乏有洞见和创见的庸吏和其烹制的杂烩汤。
Art is the spiritualism and symbol of individual. Penetrating force lacking emotions and passion will become the mediocrity without insight and creative ideas, as well as the mixed stew.
在我看来，曾谱《幽兰》明志的圣贤孔子和其所喜爱的古琴之艺也是如此：虽其冠有“九德”之限，也从不排除《广陵散》这样的抗争反叛的千古绝响。亦复如是，绘画之道中的中国水墨艺术的情感表达，不仅可以有懦弱的向善，压抑的美好，但同样也要有发愤的激越，痛定思痛的深刻，乃至壮烈的升华。我热爱艺术上有血有肉的铮铮铁骨，我渴望绘画中可歌可泣的壮烈。这是小艺术、大艺术在人生统一性上的一种气概，这是“秋风骏马塞北”的壮美！如此传统、如此境界，不仅仅是精神的继承、文化的进步，更是人格上的升华和豪迈。
In my opinion, the sage that once created Quiet Orchid to express the ambition and the ancient qin techniques that he likes are also the case: Despite the limit of "nine morals", the rebellious and struggling inimitable art like A Music From Guangling is not excluded. Similarly, the emotional expression in Chinese ink painting art in the painting has not only the weak goodness, restrained beauty, but also has the irrigated passion, reflecting profoundness and strong sublimation. I love the vivid integrity of art and I desire the heroicness in painting. This is a kind of mettle of small and big art in life unity, as well as the magnificence of "autumn wind, handsome horse and beyond the Great Wall". Such traditions and realms are not only the spiritual inheritance and cultural progress, but also the sublimation and boldness in personality.
艺术是心灵的超越性的修行。追寻艺术，是立人、立信、立志中的精己之艺、修己之德的灵魂净化与思想升华的过程。在这个德艺涵化的过程中，艺术家的人格应将不断自我完善，达成独立思考和独特个性。真正的艺术，形式的创造，语言的出新，实在是其内在的情怀、道义的担当和世界观的突破历练而出的！其呕心沥血、一生奉献、忘死济世与追求精神永恒，真是难能可贵、常人少及。扪心自问，艺术家自身的文化情结，其为天地立心、为生民立命、为往圣继绝学、为万世开太平的心怀真的具备吗？历史告诉我们，悲悯和责任与良知和道义相伴，具有情怀和担当才能抵御苟且和沉沦，而崇高的献身经常出于对自身被侏儒化的恐惧。艺术人生，无非是一种不甘于人的属性的矮化，从而不断从物格到人格、从小我到大我的提升和拯救。质言之，在立人为旨、生民为本的历史观、世界观乃至宇宙观下，追求真艺术，与做一个真正觉悟的人，是互为表里的——其知行统一的处世方式，表里如一的生活态度——即便像是“天上的”一颗流星，其崇高感和启示性，价值意义也远远大于对“脚下的”名垂青史的共同体想象。
Art is the transcending cultivation of mind. To pursue art is the process of soul purification and idea sublimation of perfecting the techniques and cultivating the morals in setting up honesty, credit and ambition. In the process of pursuing moral and art, the personality of artists should keep being perfected so as to reach independent thinking and unique individuality. The real art, the formal creation and the language novelty actually derive from the internal feelings, the responsibility of morals and the breakthrough of world outlook! Its utmost effort, lifelong dedication, sacrifice to save the world and pursuit of permanent spirit are rare and hard to catch. Ask yourself: do you really own the mind of setting up your determination for the heaven and earth, sacrifice for the masses, learning for the past knowledge and pursuit of happiness for the world in your own cultural complex. The history tells us that the pity and responsibility are accompanied by conscience and morality. Only with feelings and responsibilities can we defend against depravity and randomness. And the loft dedication is often out of terror of being dwarfed. The artistic life is no more than a kind of lowering of people's property, in order to keep improving and saving from property attribute to personality, from small ego to big ego. In essence, under the history value, world outlook and even the universe opinion with cultivating persons as the tenet and making people with the foundation, to pursue the real art and be a truly wise person is the way of living in the world and the true life attitude--even if we are like a meteor in the world, its sense of loftiness and enlightenment and value are much more than the community imagination of leaving the reputation in the history.
身边孩子们在追逐、打闹、嬉戏。清晨的空气中夹杂着一点昨日研墨的余香。我感到了内心的祥和与平静。生命在延续，美好的生活才刚刚开始。阳光洒向铺满笔墨纸砚的画案，五颜六色的书籍画册闪烁着金色的光芒。一种幸福感油然而生：生命如此美好，艺术如此圣洁！我面带微笑，走到窗前，迎着七彩斑斓的朝阳，向远外眺望——艺术也许真的可以迪导生命、慰藉灵魂、启发自由，从而使人视死如生吧……。
Children around me are chasing and playing with each other. The air in the morning is mixed with the remaining fragrance of yesterday's ink. I feel the peacefulness in my inner mind. Life goes on and the beautiful life just starts. The sunshine spreads on the painting desk paved with ink and paper. The colorful books and albums shine with golden colors. A sense of happiness is thus born: Life is so beauty. Art is so holy! I walk in front of the window with smiles on my face. Facing the colorful sunset, I look to the distant place-maybe art can really enlighten life, comfort soul and inspire freedom so as to make people regard death as life...
路漫漫其修远兮，吾将上下而求索。
The road ahead will be long and our climb will be steep.
谦之张涛写于丁酉初春
Written by Zhang Tao in the early spring of Ding You Year
于北京通州望海楼并记
On Wanghai Building, Tongzhou, Beijing
